• Radical Security For Insecure Times

    Posted on October 7, 2013 by in Anxiety, Depression, Psychotherapist Rockville MD

    I’m coining a new phrase: radical security. Radical security is giving up any and all notions that you can find security in anything outside yourself. That’s right. Your ONLY security lies within you. Your ONLY security is your ability to deal with whatever arises by applying your own creativity and energy to all that occurs.

    Radical security is radical because you will probably resist this idea. You may be thinking that money is your security or your home equity is your security or your IRA is your security. While each of these things is really good to have and I recommend saving, investing, and accruing equity, I also know that ultimately none of these can provide true security.

    A few years ago I worked this out for myself. I used to think of my home as part of my security. Whatever happens, I have my house. But in a big snowstorm a few years back, I watched as water poured into my kitchen. Ice dams in my gutters couldn’t funnel the snow melt running off my roof fast enough and water poured in the backside of my house. Stuck inside without distraction, I had little to think about besides what would happen if I needed to make a claim through my home owners policy. I know that my insurer will cancel me if I make two claims within a short period of time, so my worst case scenario mind considered that if I make a water damage claim this year and then next year the lovely silver maple out back decides to crash down on my roof, I might be an uninsured homeowner. I kept worse case scenarios going until I was living in a tent in the backyard. But I was alive and living in a tent in the backyard! This image was laugh outĀ  loud funny to me as I realizedĀ  my house isn’t absolutely necessary after all!

    Regardless of what we try to tell ourselves for comfort, our inner self knows truth and part of that truth is that we really never know what is going to happen next. That is real. That is true. So we might as well get used to the idea that our security is our responsibility, moment by moment, day by day.

    So how do we handle our insecurity with radical security? Wake up to the goodness around us. Wake up to ourselves. Wake up to our inner knowing and inner guidance. Develop friendships and networks of nourishment and care. Do this by: 1) having faith that despite all that we may read in the papers and see on the news, the world is actually a place filled with goodness and light. Think of all the people doing good, caring, loving things that never make the news. Look for these people when they do make the news! 2) tuning in to your own inner knowing. Pay attention to your gut and heart feelings and follow your gut and heart. 3) trusting that when tough times arise and whatever security you think you have – your health, your money, your family – is tested, you will dig down deep and come up with the ideas, solutions, and energy to make it through. 4) Know your team. It takes a village, not just to raise a child, but also to feel good enough and connected enough to be in touch with your creativity and energy. Keep your connections with friends and family strong and nurturing. These are the keys to radical security for tough times.


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